


don’t act like it’s a bad thing (to fall in love with me)

by thefaultinourships



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: M/M, fiona's pov of the 'mickey pouring coffee' scene and the 'he's fucking family' scene, ian talks a lot in the first part
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-24
Updated: 2014-04-24
Packaged: 2018-01-20 14:30:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1513919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefaultinourships/pseuds/thefaultinourships
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"It hits her like a ton of bricks and she almost laughs at herself for how fucking oblivious she’s been."</i>
</p><p> </p><p>Or, Fiona's POV of the 'Mickey pouring Ian coffee' scene in 3x08 and the 'he's fucking family' scene in 3x12.</p>
            </blockquote>





	don’t act like it’s a bad thing (to fall in love with me)

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by [this](http://coltonjellyfish.tumblr.com/post/83344566567/the-moment-fiona-thinks-that-mickey-and-ian-might).

_Fucking teenagers and fucking puberty_ , she thinks to herself after watching the door slam close behind her two siblings. Never mind the fact that she’s the reason they even reached this disgusted age.  
  
Groaning to herself, she turns and walks back to the kitchen in order to kick the Milkovich kid out. Having just _one_ teenage boy was like having a black hole that sucked only food into it. Seeing as she had two, sometimes, three and then four sometime relatively soon, there was just no way they could afford to have a fifth. No. Fucking. Way.  
  
Gathering up her courage because, let’s admit it- everyone was at least a little bit afraid when it came to any sort of confrontation with a member of the Milkovich family. And next to their dad, Mickey was probably the second most terrifying. Actually, seeing as their dad seemed to spend a majority of his time _doing_ time, that would leave Mickey to be the most terrifying of them.  
  
Great.  
  
When she enters the kitchen, newfound courage gathered, she pauses.  
  
Taking a moment to take in the scene in front of her, she finds herself having a slight lapse in memory when it comes to remembering why exactly Mickey was so terrifying.  
  
Considering said boy was currently pouring her young brother a cup of coffee. Like, civilly. And not at all terrifying at all, really. It was almost sort of… _couply_ looking.  
  
Huh.  
  
At that moment, Mickey turns and catches her eye. Barely holding the connection for a second, he turns his attention back to pouring the coffee. Feeling awkward for being caught eavesdropping- if you can really consider watching the neighborhood thug and her brother share a surprisingly domestic moment eavesdropping- she walks towards Ian, asking for some cash. At this, Mickey gives her a look and she has to resist the urge to look away, ashamed.  
  
As Ian gets up to fork over a couple of bills it takes her a second to realize that he’s talking. And then another to realize he isn’t talking to her but to Mickey.  
  
She feels bad for unnecessarily taking his money- not that she doesn’t need it. She’s snapped out of it, however, in time to hear Mickey say something about sacs slapping against Ian’s ass cheeks.  
  
And, okay. Ew. She will be spending the next few hours trying to get _that_ particular image of her baby brother _out_ of her head. Permanently. She may have seen him naked more times than she can count but that doesn’t mean she wants or needs to know what he does with his naked body.  
  
Ian doesn’t seem to share in her thought of disgust of Mickey’s crude wording since the younger boy just chuckles before going to sit back down.  
  
Not quite sure that the two really ever really noticed her presence anyway, Fiona still takes caution when taking some steps back until she feels like she’s safely out of at least Mickey’s peripheral. Ian would probably pay her no mind anyway seeing as he was obviously on _something_.  
  
Curiosity getting the best of her, she watches as both boys drink their coffees while eyeing each other when they think the other isn’t looking. The fact that they both end up looking at each other at the same time a majority of the time only to quickly look away and start the cycle over again tells her that they are definitely aware of what they are doing.  
  
Tilting her head at what’s probably an odd degree, Fiona tries to get a better look at the shorter boy. It’s hard to decipher the look on Mickey’s face; taking into consideration the fact that the only ones she was really used to seeing were when he was pissed or ready to beat someone to a pulp. The look he was giving Ian now though didn’t look at all like he was angry or close to murder. In fact, if she had to put a name to it, she’d say he almost looks… smitten.  
  
And no. Nope. Just no. _Smitten_ and _Mickey_ were just two words that did not go together. Especially if Ian, her _little brother_ , was involved. No way. Not going to happen. Not in a million years.  
  
Besides, Ian was such a good kid. He probably had the best people-judgment out of the whole household. He should know that this wouldn’t turn out well. He had to.  
  
The way he was smiling at the other boy and laughing at something Mickey said told her otherwise though.  
  
She’s been sitting on the couch for the last fifteen minutes or so before Mickey finally stomps by and heads upstairs. She gets up in time to interrupt her brother in his pursuit in what she guesses is to follow him.  
  
“Hey, everything okay?”  
  
“Everything’s great,” Ian replies cheerfully.  
  
“So… Mickey, huh?”  
  
Immediately, she watches as Ian’s eyes narrow. “Is this going anywhere?”  
  
“You tell me. Is it?”  
  
Ian just rolls his eyes before starting to push past her. “Nice talking to you,” he says.  
  
“Ian, all I’m saying is that you could do so much better, and-”  
  
“No, you know what? You know who could do so much better? _Mickey_. At Fiona’s unimpressed look, the younger Gallagher continues, “I mean, think about it! I come from some fucked up, crazy family- not that I don’t love you guys, because you know that I really do- but he doesn’t care! You of all people should know what it’s like to worry about whether your family will scare off the guy you like, what, with Jimmy and all. We may have grown up in the same neighborhood, but we barely even knew each other existed! Sure, he’s probably heard of the shenanigans- ha, that’s a funny word- that we get up to, but he’s never really been up close and personal with it to judge. Now he has. For fuck sake, he was just here to listen to Carl’s list of stolen police weapons he’s acquired over the years. He’s slept over! He now has every reason and ammunition the would need to judge me. And you know what?” At this, Ian rolls his eyes but smiles like he himself can’t believe it when he says, “He still wants to be with me! It’s amazing!” At the end of the spiel, Ian does a little spin in the living room before whacking his hand on the wall and cussing.  
  
Fiona can’t help but stare at her brother, a little dumbfounded. Sure, she can see where he’s coming from, but… still. She watches as her little brother starts for the stairs before turning around to face her.  
  
“You know what’s funny? You and Lip must really be siblings because he gave me almost the same exact speech.” At his sister’s questioning look, he rambles on, “he said something like ‘the best thing about dating Mickey Milkovich is that you can always find someone better.’ Do you agree with that?”  
  
After a moment’s hesitation, Fiona does something between a shrug and a nod.  
  
“See, what the two of you don’t get is that I’ve had ‘better.’ Ned, for example. Now he may not meet your standards and in no ways is a great model, but you have to agree, for all intents and purposes he’s better. I mean, he bought me stuff, he was kind and sweet and all that bullshit people think they want in their other half, yeah?”  
  
Fiona was a little speechless by now. She doesn’t think she’s ever heard her brother talk this much except for when he was drunk or high.  
  
“Ned’s basically Mickey’s exact opposite, if you think about it. At least, when it comes to boyfriend material. Even Kash, even though he was married, he cared about me, to some degree.” At this, the younger boy hesitates a little. “At least, I think he did… didn’t he?” Ian doesn’t wait for a response before he shakes his head and continues. “My point is though, I’ve had ‘better,’ but you know what? Out of all the people- wow, I sound like such a slut, don’t I? anyway, out of everyone, Mickey’s the best. In more ways than one.” With a gleeful grin and a wink, he practically hurls himself up the stairs to- Fiona shudders to think about what.  
  
 **+**  
  
Time passes how time always seems to pass in the Gallagher household. In a blur of shouts, drugs, drama, and various states of poverty and problems with Frank.  
  
She shouldn’t be surprised- it’s probably because she’s a terrible sister- but she is very much surprised when she returns home only to find out about Ian. She has to admit it, even with the mood swings she never would have guessed that it would be Ian who ended up with Monica’s disease. Then again, when it came to bad family traits, it was a game of Russian roulette.  
  
She remembers asking to see him, but everything after that is a haze of disbelief and darkness. The last time he saw this in her mother it was different somehow. Sure the same tone of disinterest in anything and everything is there, but there’s still a stark contrast between her mom’s quiet reassurance that she was just tired and her brother’s repeated whispered demands of ‘go aways’ and ‘leave me alones’.  
  
She tries to lure him out of himself with the idea of fresh air and running. As expected, all she gets is silence. It’s weird to think that the boy Lip told her ran eight miles just the other day is the same boy who looks like he could barely lift his head off the pillow. “Okay,” she concedes after a few moments of silence. She gives him a rub on shoulder, only to be met with silence again.  
  
Once the door closes behind her, she lets the worry kick in.  
  
“How long has he been like that?”  
  
“Since yesterday morning,” Mickey answers immediately.  
  
Her suspicions are confirmed when he then tells her that he hasn’t gotten out of bed since then. She asks them what he was like before and as expected she hears about his more normal persona; laughing, happy, full of _life_. Talking to Debbie, she tells them how they should get a hold of Lip. He’s easily the most knowledgeable out of everyone in the whole neighborhood.  
  
Her mind’s going crazy. She can’t deal with another basket case in the family. It’s just not possible. Still, that’s her _brother_. Just like Frank is her father and Monica her mother. She can’t just _give up_ on him. Her thoughts are interrupted when Mickey inquires about her brother’s current state.  
  
“Depression, I think,” she tells him, a little reluctantly.  
  
“H-he’s depressed? What do you mean he’s de- we all get fucking depressed. How the fuck could we not living around here?”  
  
“It’s not that kind of depressed, okay?” she snaps back. And Jesus, this is not something she wants to explain to the guy that’s been _fucking_ her little brother. “Look, I could be wrong, but… it could be bipolar disease, like our mom.”  
  
She watches as Mickey stumbles over the word, watches as just the idea of it turns his world around. She can’t help but think that this is it. Anything she says now will either scare this kid off or… well, there was no other option, was there?  
  
“It’s like high-highs followed by low-lows over and over again,” she explains. Already thinking ahead, she says, “We’ll get him an appointment at the clinic and see what they say.”  
  
Mickey protests spouting out some shit about cheering him up. The boy shrugs, like it’s that easy. She can see though; the fear that was there just a moment ago is starting to flood over. Going in for the kill, she insists that it’s not as easy as Mickey wishes it was and says that Ian may have to be hospitalized.  
“What do you mean, hos-? L-like a psych ward?”  
  
Fiona just stares at him until he gets it.  
  
In the next moment, she watches Mickey snap. Except, not in the way she was thinking.  
  
“No _fucking_ way! No fucking way!” he says, contradicting her prediction of how he would immediately try to the younger boy- a medically claimed crazy person- out of the house. “He’s staying here,” Mickey says, no room for argument.  
  
 _It must be teenage instinct or something_ , she thinks. Telling the kid one thing so naturally he rebels. Maybe it was just a Mickey thing. Trying again, she tells him how Ian could end up suicidal.  
  
Stubborn as ever, Mickey just suggests hiding the knives. “I can- I can take care of him, okay? L-let me take care of him until he’s better.”  
  
Fighting fire with fire, she just argues, “It can be weeks. It’s mood swings, okay?” Desperate to make this boy understand that this isn’t just some depressing thoughts that can be cured by fucking it out of him or sugar coated promises, she says, “It’s almost impossible to handle.”  
  
“Don’t fucking tell me what’s impossible!” That startles her out of her train of thought. She watches as Mickey snaps, again, in a way that takes her by surprise. “We’re taking care of him _here_. You, me, _us_.” Stepping closer to her, he makes sure he can tell he’s serious when he says, “He’s fucking family.” For some reason, she feels like a _or did you forget that?_ was left unsaid.  
  
Speechless, Fiona can’t help but wonder what Mickey sees in her brother that’s making him stick around and fight. Then she realizes how cruel that sounds. And how, at the same time, she just subjected herself to willing to give up on Ian. No way was she going to do that. No way.  
  
However, Fiona can’t help but think of Monica, how the family let her fuck off on her own once she was too complicated for even _them_. Then she thinks of Frank, how they’ve been on the verge of letting him go as well with all the troubles he’s been causing. Her mind flashes back to how easy it was to let Lip go when given the ultimatum.  
  
Then she realizes that that’s the difference between Mickey and her. While she’s too easy to let go of her brother, it seems that Mickey is just that more determined to hold on.  
  
Underneath the determination though, Fiona notices that Mickey looks scared. There’s no other way to put it. But not scared for himself like she expected, but scared of _losing_ something.  
  
 _But what does he have to be scared of?_ She thinks. _Its’ not like he’s the one the doctors will be hauling away if they’re called_.  
  
No, it’s… Ian.  
  
It hits her like a ton of bricks and she almost laughs at herself for how fucking oblivious she’s been. Or, maybe not oblivious, but _unwilling_. She’s been denying what she knew since that morning: Mickey loved Ian. Hell, why stop there? For all she knew, the kid was _in_ love. With her brother.  
  
Shit.  
  
In the time it’s taken her brain to go through all this new information, she realizes that there are tears building in her eyes. Wiping her nose, she turns to Debbie, telling the younger girl something about work and how they should call Lip. Clearing her head, she tries to think of something normal. She scoffs at herself.  
  
 _Normal, yeah right_. A moment later, she realizes that this may be their new normal.  
  
“He’s not going to some fucking nuthouse, you hear me?” Mickey calls out after them.  
  
She turns to face him and can’t help but wonder how long before his resolve breaks. How many episodes will her brother suffer before this kid realizes he’s in over his head.  
  
At the same time though, she finds that a new side of her is rooting for Mickey to prove her wrong. Let him stand by his words. No, let him stand by his _actions_. Because she’s just now realizing that she herself has said countless times how much she loves her brother. Yet, she was the first one ready to lock him up just to get away from the threat of having to deal with the inevitable side effects. Thinking about what Kev told her about what happened at the bar the other night, Mickey has said more things to discourage Ian than she probably knows. Then he just goes and does things that contradict what he’s just said.  
  
The truth is, Mickey is reckless and unpredictable. And maybe that’s what her brother needs at the moment. If Ian were to ever go off the hinge and kill someone- and based off what Mandy and Mickey told her, it doesn’t seem unlikely anymore- he’ll need someone to try to convince him not to, but at the same time he needs someone who’s willing to hide the body once the deed is done.  
  
Fiona is self-aware enough to realize that Mickey is more likely to do this while she herself would be the kind of person to calm her brother down just so she could call the cops after.  
  
Out of all the people in the world to fall in love with, Mickey Milkovich is, without a doubt, _not_ the best person for someone to choose. However, Fiona can’t help but think that maybe he’s the right person for _Ian_ to fall in love with.  
  
“He stays here. He’s staying with me.”  
  
She watches as he takes a sip of his beer and seeing his panicked look. Except this time she realizes that it’s for different reasons than she would have originally thought before coming into this house.  
  
Maybe this could work.  
  
So long as for every time she lets go, Mickey continues to hold on that much tighter.  
  
 _Shouldn’t be a problem_ , she thinks. Because if there’s anything she’s learned in the last few minutes, it’s that Mickey Milkovich is a fighter.  
  
Then again, everyone already kind of knew that.

**Author's Note:**

> i am lazy. i have math homework to start. i will edit this later. hope you enjoyed this!


End file.
